Fumble in your handbag for car keys while telling yourself you ought to be more organized.
Unlock the car, collapse in the driver’s seat while putting the day’s worth of baggages and burdens on the empty passenger seat beside you.
Kick off the shoes that have been clinging on and compressing your feet.
Close your eyes for a moment, and realize that your breath is hard and labored.
And realize that you’re alone in a carpark filled with empty vehicles.
And realize you find refuge in this metal-bodied solace, as if the UV-blocking tinted windows kept all things negative away from you.
Then you take a deep breath and start the car, hoping that the airconditioning would save you from the sweltering heat and sweltering thoughts swimming in your head. A chirpy voice blares from the speakers in feigned and strained enthusiasm.
And you wait. You wait, for your mind to settle down and some peace to settle into the crevices of your brain. You close your eyes again, tuning out of what’s playing on the radio. It’s taking too long. A voice inside of you reminds you that IDLING IS THE MAIN CAUSE OF FUEL WASTAGE. So you shut off the engine and sink into the silence and warmth of a car that was expecting to head somewhere but had its dreams dashed.
Wait for me to gather enough courage to face the world before taking me back.